Morning Tea with a group

Twice a week my kids eat morning tea with a large group of children. This can be quite a stressful situation.

The first morning tea is a creche situation when I go to a women's bible study. Here the morning tea is totally provided and due to the allergy situation, the only things that are served are fruit and plain corn thins. It is a very healthy morning tea for all the kids as well as being safe and means I don't worry that my kids might get someone elses food while I'm not there to control it.

The second morning tea is at playgroup. There can be up to 25 kids and parents there so it's pretty crazy. Thankfully the kids all sit at tables but they have a shared morning tea. We bring a piece of fruit but some parents bring other things like popcorn, biscuits, cake etc. When we started playgroup this year, the playgroup coordinator made an announcement about my son's allergies and asked that people don't bring anything with nuts in it. So far so good.

Since then, my daughter was diagnosed with gluten, dairy and egg allergies - non life-threatening but health-affecting. I spoke with the playgroup coordinator this term and we worked out some guidelines that would make it better for everyone.

These are what we agreed on:
- Morning tea is only to be eaten in the morning tea room at the tables (this was expected anyway, but not always abided by) and no food in the play area where possible.
- People can still bring biscuits, cakes etc to share but know that my daughter can't eat it and protect her from it eg: fruit is on a separate plate to other foods and try not to cross-contaminate serving implements (something that still happens, so I try to serve her early)
- A reminder of no nuts (My son's allergy is life threatening. The group needs to care for him) We avoid things with nuts in the ingredients list. My allergy specialist said to ignore the warnings of 'this product may contain traces etc' because it is used too widely now in this litigious society.

The playgroup coordinator announced it to everyone and thankfully, no-one seemed to have a problem with it.

I bring a container of food my daughter can eat (including something yummy, like "Itsy Bitsy Bears" - everyone else gets something yummy so she should too really) and she gets to have a bowl of the fruit as well.

It's a lot less stressful knowing that everyone in the playgroup is aware of my children's allergies. They ask about it and I can educate them. By them knowing, they can help me protect my children as well. Preschool will be our next hurdle. I'm thankful for all the kids with allergies who have gone before us - paving the way would have been hard work.

Can I encourage you to tell coordinators about your children's allergies. The more people who know the better. And I think it's important for the kids to keep hearing it as long as it's presented in a way that doesn't bring any shame on the children. Keep an eye on their reaction to announcements and keep talking to them about it and help them know that it's ok to have an allergy (we have no control over who gets them) and that they must not eat what makes them sick. Teach them to ask before they take food as well - a self-control skill that is good to teach to any children - but one worth being strict on early with children with allergies.